[ To be fair, most of Eddie’s older friends have graduated and moved on. That’s what happens when you fail your senior year twice and get left behind. It may be part of why he’s grown so fond of Steve. The two of them are wildly different, but it’s nice having someone to talk to who isn’t still worried about the going-on of Hawkins High. ]
pizza and spaghetti have the same exact flavors steve it’s a match made in heaven
[ Never mind the textures, but…Eddie clearly doesn’t mind. ]
most vegetarians I’m pretty sure???
leah yeah let yourself in maybe i’ll have that drink for you
[ Considering how living in Hawkins is akin to being in the epicenter of the apocalypse, it is no wonder more and more people are leaving town as well. So there's that to consider, aside from their own personal social failures. Maybe it's why those who are left can form such tight bons. ]
Not true, there are like hundreds of different pizza flavors. And it's all about how weird it is to bite into something pizza-shaped and then end with a mouthful of stringy pasta.
[ Is this really such a big deal? No, but he finds it funny how offended and passionate Eddie can get over these sorts of things. He's no better. ]
... Fine, you got a point, about vegetarians. Smartass.
I'm getting in the car, so I won't be able to reply until I am waiting for the pizzas. But yeah, I'm omw right now.
Oh? Mr. Mundson, are you actually propositioning me?
[ There's definitely a myriad of more important things to worry about...but if Eddie is going to get fired up about something, it's probably better that it's weird pizza opinions than music. He'd never shut up if it was music.
He makes good use of Steve’s inability to reply, only sending his next message when he's sure he's hit the road. ]
Soooooo you just like to put weird stuff in your mouth to experience the 'contrast.' Noted.
[ If they argue about these sorts of silly things when they're not worrying about their possible impending doom, Steve is welcoming the chance to just be absurd young men with pizza and music opinions.
And hey, Steve also has a bit of an eclectic music taste. Eddie doesn't want to know the bullshit some people have given him just for listening to Queen. Talk about others not having good taste.
Eddie is correct that he doesn't have time to check the new messages until he's stopped by the pizza parlor and is waiting for their order. And when Steve sees that last text, he almost drops the phone. No way Eddie is actually serious. He's just playing along, and Steve is being silly.
Or are they?
Ever since befriending Robin, he's learned a lot of new things about relationships and people, and hell, maybe a bit about himself that he has never fully admitted. It's all too much to think about on a Friday night; maybe he should text Robin and ask if he's overthinking, but that will make it clear that he is, and oh fucks, Eddie must have been waiting for a reply to his text for longer than 10 minutes now. Godamnnit. ]
Then you'd better put your money where your mouth is.
[ He's going to throw his phone on the shotgun seat, rest his hands on the steering wheel, and bury his face there until the pizzas are ready. And then he will drove to Forest Hills Trailer Park and try not to die of embarrassment in the process. ]
[ There’s almost always at least a crumb of truth to most of Eddie’s antics. He gets obsessive and fixated on incredibly small things (i.e. pizza-ghetti) and while he blows it all out of proportion in the most dramatic way humanly possible to keep an argument going or for the sake of a laugh, it doesn’t mean he’s faking. He does like a good pizza-ghetti…and he’s also come to the conclusion that he really does like Steve. To an extent he’s never liked anyone before.
His own attraction to men has never really seemed to matter much when he’s never done the whole relationship song and dance to begin with. It’s just always been a thing that existed in the background, vaguely acknowledged but never really interacted with--because this is the wrong place, there’s never been the right person, and there’s always been no time to make it work.
But something has shifted, and now he’s not so sure that the right person hasn't been staring him right in his face for months. Maybe it’s the fact that he almost died, or the fact that everything fucking sucks and he’s never getting out of this godforsaken town and still wakes up to graffiti on his door at least once a week accusing him of devil worship, but he’s feeling bolder as of late. Any shits he ever gave have been thrown well and truly out the window when he sends that text.
And then he immediately wonders if he should backtrack.
He paces and eyes his watch, trying to estimate what the right amount of time to wait is before he proclaims it was just a joke and don’t get too worked up about it, man. How long does it really take to grab a pizza? He’s convinced he’s worn the carpet thin by the time he gets a response, and he scrambles to read it.
Oh.
Okay.
Well… ]
will do ;)
[ He’ll be waiting when Steve pulls up, leaned against the frame of the open door, light pouring out from behind him. If he’s nervous (and god, he is; his heart is pounding and his shaking hands are only masked by the fact that his arms are crossed over his chest), he hides it well, smiling a lazy smile as Steve steps onto the rickety porch. ]
Harrington.
[ He inclines his head and begins to move aside to let him in, but then his gaze falls on the boxes and he lets out a bark of laughter. ]
Did you actually bring me a pizza-ghetti? You’re a real gentleman, huh?
[ It's exactly because there's some truth to what Eddie always says that these kinds of conversations and the occasional argument allow Steve to get a better understanding about how Eddie really is. And so far, he's really liked what he's seen; it's at the same time new and not completely different from how he had assumed Eddie Mundson was while they were both in high school. Steve admires Eddie's ability to be so unapologetically himself; it's a kind of bravery he can't match.
Steve's relationship with men had never exactly been stellar. His own father is an insufferable asshole who is also a cheater. His ex-best friend Tommy was shallow and mean, and for years Steve refused to acknowledge it because he was his closest friend. He doesn't want to talk badly about Billy Hargrove, both because he was Max's sibling and because it's rude to speak ill of the dead, but the guy almost killed him after he spent a whole semester giving Steve the weirdest mixed signals. So, not great either.
None has really felt safe before. Not the way Eddie does.
And Eddie is, well, all the things Dustin assumed Steve liked about Robin. He's funny, smarter than anyone gives him credit for, and more selfless than he himself gives credit for. He can also drive Steve up a wall and get him to act a bit childish, which isn't exactly as much of a downside as others might think. Eddie also couldn't care less about Steve's reputation or who he was supposed to be, not anymore, and that feels so freeing.
And the curly hair is nice. The 'I want to touch it and see how it feels' type of nice. It's hella distracting when Eddie sometimes munches on a strand or plays with it.
Those are the things Steve kept thinking about as he drove to Eddie's place after reading that last text, and it's honestly a miracle he didn't hit a lamp pole on the way there.
Okay, he can do this; he can play it cool. It's all about steps. Grab the pizzas, get in, meet Eddie, do NOT hold onto the pizza box that hard, the sides are getting squished, do not smile like you're having a nervous breakdown... ]
I think that after almost dying, we might have reached the stage where you can call me by my first name, you know.
[ Smiling is actually the easiest part, because he is happy to see Eddie, even if he's got no idea what he got himself into. ]
And yes, I've got you your pizza-ghetti abomination. [ Steve lets out a dramatic sigh; he's learning that shit from both Max and Dustin, but then he's back to smiling and offering the aforementioned abomination to Eddie. ] Well, I do try. Just because it's something I am not used to, it doesn't mean I can't learn to like it too. Some things are an acquired taste, right?
If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you just called me an acquired taste, Steve.
[ He tilts his head and grins, putting an emphasis on the use of his first name. He does an admirable job at making it all seem easy, smiling lazily like he’s not ready to shake right out of his skin with nerves, but he’s all too aware that if he doesn’t move this conversation on quickly, he’s going to start overthinking everything.
So he gives his racing thoughts no opportunity to get the jump on him. He pushes off of the doorframe and makes a vague gesture for Steve to follow him inside, wandering off into the depths of the kitchen before he can even confirm that he has followed. ]
And, uh, I do call you by your first name all the time, by the way. Maybe, just maybe, I like the variety.
[ His voice comes slightly muffled as he rummages through the fridge. ]
Which is something I don’t have when it comes to drinks, so, uh…will it be beer, beer or…big surprise…beer?
Me? Would I do such a thing, Eddie? [ The innocent look on Steve's face seems to scream, 'Yes, absolutely.' It doesn't take him long to break the façade and smirk back at Eddie, nudging him with his foot because his hands are busy.
Eddie's voice and mannerisms make the casualness convincing for sure, which leaves Steve wondering if he's the only one who's always a hair away from a nervous breakdown.
He used to be better at these things, the whole song and dance of flirting and figuring out if the other person was interested. It's something he only did with girls, and he's a bit out of his element here because Hawkins, Indiana, is the worst possible place to test out where your boundaries lie in terms of attraction, but...but. He really would like things to work out with Eddie. If there is anything to work out between the two, that's it.
The other man moving moving gets Steve out of his head and back on track, and he's quick to follow him and place the pizza boxes on the counter once they reach the kitchen. ]
There's nothing wrong with liking variety; it makes life more interesting, right? [ He leans his hip against the counter as he watches Eddie fish out whatever he can find. ] Tsh, well, those are very difficult choices. Maybe beer, I'm not picky.
[ Eddie will find him still smiling when he decides to turn around. Either that, or he will notice Steve looking around with interest before their eyes meet again. ]
This place looks so much better now that there's no portal to hell in your ceiling. I like it; it seems very lived-in.
[ It's an honest admission, even if Eddie's house might look a bit messy and there's a concerning amount of mugs around. It looks like a home. Unlike his house, which mostly looks like an home decor catalog because his parents have a very strict opinion on how things might look for appearance's sake, even if they're never at home. It makes the house very cold and lifeless. ]
[ He echoes back to him, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. He is an acquired taste, and perhaps not one that many people dare to sample. He’s loud and opinionated and quick to anger, likes his music loud enough to shatter eardrums, talks too much when he’s nervous, doesn’t understand the concept of personal space…and yet his pitiful hope is that maybe, just maybe, Steve Harrington is one of those brave few.
He keeps going back and forth on it. That message—you'd better put your money where your mouth is—it sounded like a challenge, not a denial, but this shitty little backwoods town isn’t the place for a person to be attracted to anything but the opposite sex. And while Eddie couldn’t care less, who’s to say that Steve doesn’t feel differently?
He takes his tie in the fridge, vaguely hoping that he’ll find something in there to make all of this easier. He doesn’t. So he cracks another joke instead. ]
Sorry, I lied. Fresh out of beer. Only have beer.
[ Finally, he collects two bottles and turns to place them on the counter, his heart damn near leaping out of his throat when he’s met with that goddamn smile that might just be his favorite image in the world. Their eyes meet, and Eddie is quick to glance away, suddenly finding a lock of his own hair very interesting. He twists a dark curl around a finger, then slips it into his mouth to chew on. It’s an awful habit, one he’s had since he was a kid, and a clear sign of nerves.
He’s grateful for the distraction when Steve moves on to the state of the house. He pulls himself up to sit on the counter, observing the ceiling above them. ]
Almost seems normal now, right? Like it…like it never even happened.
[ A frown creases his features. Having his home back is fantastic, but he’ll never be able to shake the image of what happened here. It plagues nightmares and day terrors and the thought of just taking off to leave it all behind crosses his mind at least once a day. He’ll never do it, though. Not when it feels like there’s still so much tying him here. ]
Sometimes I think I dreamt it, but…that would be too easy, huh?
[ If Steve didn't enjoy loud and opinionated people, he would not have Robin and Dustin as his best friends or Nancy as his past love, for that matter. He seems to simply gravitate towards those kinds of people. Frankly, the surprise at the admission that he likes Eddie more than what's normal in a friendship has been second to the mortifying realization that he has a clear type when it comes to relationships. How positively embarrassing in how obvious it has always been when he thought about it.
But it also seems that he works well with those kinds of people too, either by balancing out their extremes with his own personality or by enabling their shenanigans when the moment called for it. Maybe he's not a total lost cause when it comes to relationships, even though he still needs to have a successful one now that he's finally being himself instead of putting up a front to make others like him. ]
Shame, but I think I can handle your beer.
[ What he cannot handle so well is Eddie fidgeting and munching on a strand of curly brown hair, because then his eyes immediately go to it, which means Steve's staring at Eddie's mouth before he realizes he's doing it and hastily looks away. Yeah, that kind of thing can get you punched or worse around here, but perhaps Eddie did not notice.
And maybe Vecna would simply drop dead one day on his own and stop being a problem. Sure, why not?
He can dream. And what was that thing Robin told him one day, about some sort of code to know if people were into the same thing as you? Something about being friends with Dorothy? ]
So, uhm....do you like The Wizard of Oz?
[ Wait, that wasn't it!, and Steve regrets opening his mouth almost immediately. That sounded so stupid.
While mentally chastising himself, and as Eddie sits on the counter, he reaches out to grab both bottles of beer and uses one to open the other, placing the corner or lip of the second bottle's cap under the edge of the cap on the first. A neat little trick he learned ages ago. He hands the open beer to Eddie and hooks the first bottle cap on the edge of the opening of his one bottle, popping the second bottle cap open. He's listening to Eddie as he does it, and his brows furrow in understanding. ]
Yeah, I know how it is. For the longest time, I couldn't even go near my pool, especially at night. Not after learning that one of Nancy's friends was taken by a demogorgon while she was at my house. If only we could get rid of the terrifying memories and scars with some new paintjob. A do over.
[ Steve has one hand curled around the beer, but the other curls slightly over his midsection. They don't hurt anymore, but the wound caused by the demobats has left him with some awful scarring, something Eddie also knows well. He worries about the other kind of scars that are harder to spot and are there nonetheless, less about himself and more about the kid and his other friends, like Eddie. ]
You can talk to me if you need it. You know that, right? Since explain this to people who had no idea what happened is out of the question and all...at least we can have each other's backs.
I mean, the monkeys freaked me out as a kid but uh, it’s an alright movie, yeah.
[ Eddie isn’t familiar with the terminology anyway, not really moving in the right circles to understand what it is that Steve is trying to ask, even if he had gotten the the phrase right. There’s a lot he could probably learn from Robin; he’s just never needed to know before. He blinks and raises his eyebrows, looking amused. ]
Just curious, or…?
[ He doesn’t chastise him for the odd question, just tilts his head and fails to fight back a fond smile. Steve fumbles more than Eddie would have ever expected someone with a reputation for being suave and charming to fumble, but he finds it almost painfully endearing. He almost feels a little smug, knowing that the side of Steve that he gets to see—the one that’s a little more human and a little less performance for the sake of other people—is one that so many others have missed out on. Their loss, really.
He snorts and gives a little roll of his eyes at that neat little bottle trick. ]
Alright, showoff. Calm down. Wouldn’t want me falling in love, would you?
[ As if he didn’t already fall for him ages ago. It might even be a way to test the waters, to figure out if they’re on the same page, or at least a similar one—if only Eddie didn’t say such things on the regular. He doesn’t allow his words linger between them anyway. He clears his throat, reaches for his beer, and abandons chewing on his hair in favor of sipping it quietly as he observes the perfectly normal ceiling. It feels too normal, like there should be some evidence of what happened, but it’s all been patched and painted and covered up. ]
Yeah, I know, man.
[ Wayne worries, but he’s known his nephew for long enough to know that he can’t strong-arm anything out of him. Eddie is too stubborn for that, and he doesn’t want to burden his uncle more than he already has, so he keeps quiet. Doesn’t tell him that he sometimes aches so bad, he struggles to get out of bed in the morning, or that he’ll forego sleep entirely if he hears so much as a rustle outside, or that he sometimes feels like he did die and that all of this is an unexplainable figment of his imagination.
But Steve—Steve was there too. He’s experienced all of this more than once and, from the sound of it, plenty of sleepless nights and nightmares too. It’s a shared experience and there’s nothing that needs explaining between the two of them, nothing he can say that should sound too outlandish. Eddie frowns, his hand drifting to his torso where a knot of nasty scar tissue lives now, just beneath the thin fabric of his t-shirt. ]
So, uh…you’d let me know if I was actually dead, right? If I didn’t actually get dragged out of there or something?
Right, you're right. Yeah, I think we both had enough of strange flying creatures in our lives.
Boy, did they. Okay, Eddie's answer was absolutely not helpful at all, or perhaps Steve missed something when Robin explained this to him. Either way, he's clearly misstepped and feels like an idiot, but because that is not exactly a new feeling for him, he's going to soldier on.
No reason, really. After working at Family Video, I have stupid movies in my head all day.
[He shrugs and takes a sip of his drink in an attempt to look nonchalant, and if Eddie doesn't buy that excuse, perhaps the view of Steve's exposed throat might distract him.] Robin would also like to know there are others like her in Hawkins; perhaps one day she will open up to Eddie as well.
Steve is relieved that Eddie doesn't seem too put off by the odd question. That's another thing he liked about the other man; he knows how to put others at ease when needed, even if that smile is doing funny things to his stomach. He smiles back, because how can he not?
Someone actually liking Steve for who he is to the core, a normal guy who gets a bit awkward in front of someone he actually likes, would be a pleasant novelty. He can still be smooth if need be; that comes easy when he's comfortable with the other person, but his dorky side might also show up more. It's a 50/50 on which side Eddie might find more interesting.
It's just one of the many I know. You should have seen how fast I could shotgun a beer back in the day. It's the reason I no longer have a gag reflex. [ He allows himself a grin, even if he doesn't really miss his time as King Steve. Then, at Eddie's question, he seems to think about it for an actual three seconds, considering if he's reading too much into it, before adding; ] Would that really be so bad? I like to think I could be a pretty decent boyfriend.
[ It's said casually enough that Eddie might simply take it as a joke if he doesn't want to read too much into it, but there's an almost unnoticeable edge to Steve's voice, something in the way he's holding his shoulder now, that seems to show he's asking a legitimate question back. They're both careful, and for a good reason, but Steve starts to think he might not be the only one walking on eggshells around something they're too afraid to voice out loud.
And then the reality they live in, with a parallel dimension and monsters, becomes once again too hard to ignore. Steve doesn't look at the ceiling, instead he keeps his eyes on Eddie to try and get a read on his body language because personal new feelings aside, he does want the best for Eddie and worries about all the shit he had to go through. Not only the demobats and Vecna, but the much harsher reality of seeing an innocent girl murdered in front of you and having a whole town blame you for it,
He might not be familiar with that specific experience, but he is no stranger to post-traumatic stress, to looking for dangers in shadows, and to knowing you can't even tell your family why you jump when the lights flicker or a room feels too cold. ]
You're not dead, Eddie, promise. We made it out, you kept Dustin safe, something I'll never be able to thank you enough for. Just don't tell the little shit, okay? [ As if Dustin already doesn't know that Steve would do anything for him, or any of the other kids. ] And besides...! If you were dead and I am here with you, that would mean I might be dead too. And would a corpse has such fantastic hair as you and me? I don't think so.
[ He doesn’t buy it. It was too specific of a question to be little more than a stray work thought floating around in Steve’s head, and Eddie tries to mentally walk himself through the movie to understand what Steve might be implying. He doesn’t get further than the twister when the view of Steve’s exposed throat thoroughly distracts him, and then that goddamn smile is enough to dismantle any further question he may have about the subject. He leaves it be.
Honestly, he’d be content to just do this all evening—stare and daydream and admire Steve while the two of them simply exist in the same room. It sounds like a good enough night to him, because that’s about as far as this can ever go, right? Maybe he misunderstood that message, because nothing can actually happen between them and Eddie is content to just deal with that and pretend like he doesn’t feel more.
But the it’s the reason I no longer have a gag reflex—that’s what gets him. Eddie chokes on his beer, goes beet red, and covers his face with his hands with a soft murmur of “oh my god”. He sits there for a moment, peering over his fingers with an upturned gaze. One sinful thought alone wouldn’t be so bad, but Steve just has to follow it up with the implication that he could be a decent boyfriend, and Eddie can’t quite pull himself together as quickly as he would like.
Still flushed bright red, he clears his throat and tries to soothe his nerves with another swig off beer. If he had any worries about being dead before, they’re gone now. There’s no mistaking the uptick in his pulse, his heart pounding like a drum in his ears. ]
I, uh…I think I could fall in love with worse.
[ He bites his nails, pausing for just a moment, eyes wide. And then he decides to just go for it, take the leap. He doesn’t have much to lose at this point. ]
Would it be so bad if I did? Fall in love with you, I mean.
[ Steve can be a bit of a shitty liar, so it's no wonder Eddie isn't convinced. To be honest, Steve himself has no idea what the Wizard of Oz or Dorothy has to do with liking people of the same sex, but that's what Robin said. Maybe he will have to ask her to explain it all to him again; his memory isn't always the best, which is probably a consequence of his many past concussions.
But all that stops being so important the moment Eddie blushes up a storm, because Steve can see it even with the man covering his face. He's torn between being a little concerned about the sudden reaction, wondering which one of his comments caused it, and then finding it absolutely endearing. ]
You okay there, Eds?
[ He has to ask because he is a good friend who worries; but if Eddie peeks at him from in between his fingers, he will see Steve with his head tilted towards him like a big puppy who's staring at something fascinating and with a little smile on his face. The smile looks more hopeful than smug or anything of the sort; there's in fact a hint of insecurity to it if one looks at Steve's eyes.
Perhaps that was too much? It was too much.
But then Eddie actually answers, still flushed in a way that makes Steve want to crawl in his personal space and kiss each one of his cheekbones. And that is such a wild thought to have about a male friend of all things, but it's not that much different from the ones he's had when he was actually dating and in love with Nancy, so it all feels natural, really. That is probably the scariest part, that he can tell already that he's in too deep.
He's not the only one, if what Eddie is saying means that he's got it just as bad. It gives Steve hope, and it makes him nervous as hell, but he also can't fight the smile that's spreading on his lips. ]
No, it won't be. Dangerous, perhaps, since we live in this shit town, but...I think it all would be worth it. That you're worth it.
[ It's honestly a miracle that he manages to get that out without stuttering or making a fool of himself, but Steve figured that if Eddie was brave enough to give him an honest answer, he deserves the same. Steve doesn't think he's ever felt this nervous or terrified of what might happen since that night in the tunnels with Dustin, when Steve and his nail bat were the only thing between the kid and a pack of demogods. Steve takes a deep breath, hands fidgeting with the beer bottle. ]
I really like you, Eddie. [ And it might sound a little childish and innocent, considering who they were, but it is the best way Steve knows how to express this right now. ] And it's a little scary, but it's the truth.
[ He murmurs something about something being caught in his throat, face still flushed pink even when he finally drags his hands all the way down his face. It’s a triple hitter when Steve calls him Eds as well, and he feels like he could use a good cold shower at that point.
He’s thoroughly flustered, however, when Steve says those four little words: I really like you. ]
Yeah…?
[ His hand goes straight to his hair again, tugging on a curl anxiously. His gaze shifts to Steve, eyes enormous and dark as he searches his face for…anything. Any sign that he may be fucking with him or trying to tell a bad joke, any sign that Eddie needs to shut this down before it becomes really bad, but all he finds is honesty. ]
I, uh…
[ He licks his lips, swallows thickly, and shit, he’s terrified. His heart pounds in his eardrums and flutters like a bird against the confines of his ribcage, desperate to be free. Yearning quietly is one thing—the safe thing, but putting it out there in the world…it can’t be taken back after that. But Steve was brave enough to say it, and Eddie…Eddie is supposed to be putting his money where his mouth is, so… ]
I like you too, man. Like—a hell of a lot more than I’ve ever liked anyone, honestly?
[ He takes a deep breath and shakes his head. ]
But it doesn’t—it doesn’t have to be anything, you know? You don’t have to—we don’t have to—I can pretend you didn’t say anything. If you want.
[ He peers up at him with a weak smile, anxiety etched into his features. He wants so badly to reach out and take this for what it is, to pull Steve in by his collar and kiss him absolutely stupid before he can change his mind and laugh it all off, but he just can’t. Because Steve is right—it is extremely dangerous in this shitty little midwest town where Eddie gets harassed just for his long hair and metal music. And that’s Eddie, who couldn’t give less of a shit what people think of him. Steve Harrington, however…popular, handsome, affluent family, known chick magnet.
[ It's really, really hard to look away from Eddie when he's so flustered, so he doesn't, even if Steve does try not to stare directly like a creep. There are just a lot of Eddie's mannerisms that he's been noticing for a while, and they're either kind of endearing or funny, and Eddie also being pretty good-looking doesn't hurt. When he licks his lips, Steve's attention immediately goes to them before he can catch himself and look up again. Damn, those are pretty too and look so plush.
All those are things Steve would never have imagined before; he would be thinking about another man, but life throws you curveballs like those. Like when Eddie admits he likes him back, because what are the odds of that? Steve feels himself torn between wanting to beam at Eddie, fidget some more, and hyperventilate, but he managed to keep that last reaction in check. He runs his fingers through his hair to get it out of his face and maybe takes a second to coyly hide behind his hand for a moment. ]
Oh, that's great. I mean, more than great. I wasn't expecting reciprocation, so this is g... [ Don't say great again! ] ...fantastic.
[ It feels a little awkward to talk to him about this when he's still seated, so he stands up so they're at the same eye level and moves closer to Eddie. Steve's just like that, it seems, moving towards uncertainty or possible doom when he should be running for the hills and saving himself a lot of trouble. But Eddie's wroth, as he said, and he's a man of his word. He takes a deep breath, his Adam's apple bobbing slightly as he gulps before speaking. ]
No, that's not okay. You don't have to. We don't…we shouldn't have to do that.
[ He understands why Eddie is offering, and right here is probably the correct moment to decide what to do next, because they do not live in kinder times or around open-minded people. But he also knows what pretending is like; he's done it plenty in the past, even if the situation is different. He doesn't want Eddie to have to do that, like he didn't want Robin to hide from him either. It hurts too much not to be faithful to yourself. He reaches out to gently brush his hand against Eddie, slow enough that the other man can pull away if he wants, making Steve's own wariness evident. He gives a small smile of his own in response to that hesitant one, though, aiming for encouraging. ]
Besides, it wouldn't really change anything, would it? Not for me, at least.
[ Steve’s overuse of the word great makes him snort and makes the corner of his mouth twitch with the threat of a fond smile as he pulls a curl taut then twists it back around his finger, avoiding Steve’s gaze all the while. He wants so desperately to look at him, wants to melt into his eyes and his smile and just live in their warmth for a time, but he doesn’t allow himself that. Not yet. Not until he’s stilled his heart and calmed some of his terror. ]
I know I’m a freak, Steve, but I’m not insane enough to not reciprocate.
[ Steve is an easy man to fall for, no matter how little experience Eddie has with the concept. Handsome and brave and caring and frankly hilarious whether he means to be or not is apparently a dangerous combo for Eddie. But this is neither the ideal place nor the ideal time, and Steve is right, they shouldn’t have to do pretend, but they will, and why should Steve have to navigate the complexities of a relationship like this when he can just find a pretty girl? Any pretty girl he wants. Eddie just wants so badly to spare him everything about this, but…
Eddie closes his eyes, takes a deep breath as Steve moves from the space beside him. He waits for a beat, assuming the sound of the ancient screen door is going to follow, thus leaving him with two uneaten pizzas and a broken heart. But that isn’t what happens. Steve merely comes to stand before him. He brushes his hand against Eddie’s, and Eddie doesn’t pull back. In fact, he carefully brushes his thumb against Steve’s as his eyelids flutter open once more and finally shifts his gaze to Steve’s and—he’s lost. That smile is everything, and he’d happily gaze at it for the rest of his life given the opportunity. ]
It wouldn't change. You'd just be putting a lid on it.
[ That’s one thing. You can hide it all you like but it doesn’t exactly go away. Eddie hesitates. ]
Hey, uh, Steve?
[ His voice comes soft as he scoots forward to the edge of the counter. ]
You know, if you wanted to kiss me, I wouldn’t exactly be opposed.
[ Okay, he made an idiot of himself, so that's not new. Steve huffs in amusement, too, after hearing Eddie because, thanks to Robin, he has learned how to laugh at himself. Despite how awkward his answer was, it almost made a smile appear on Eddie's lips, and thus, he considers it a win.
His eyes keep going to Eddie's hands and his long fingers, which frankly look very nice and he wouldn't mind feeling them on him, to the point he's starting to get jealous of the guy's hair. Steve can't help but marvel at the realization of how cute it is that Eddie is being kind of shy over all this. Better that than anger or disgust. Steve hadn't known what to expect; he didn't exactly have plans to ever tell Eddie about his growing interest, but he's glad that he did now, even if everything is still so new and fragile. ]
You're not a freak. You're just...different. That isn't bad, despite what people might tell you. You're fun, you have a great imagination, and you're kind. If that's being a freak, maybe we all should be more freaky on the regular.
[ He seems affronted that Eddie would call himself that, even if it's true that he's heard people call him those kinds of things—and worse—before. It makes Steve feel guilty, too, because his past is filled with bad decisions and condescending name-calling towards people who didn't deserve it, like Eddie, and now he knows better.
His protectiveness came up so fast that his brain didn't register that Eddie said 'reciprocate' until a good long second after the fact. Oh. If Eddie does glance at him, he might see Steve realize that in real time, a little but pleased smile appears on his face, not smug but satisfied that Eddie might like him back.
In this town, yes, they would need to keep up appearances in front of others and pretend so they can keep each other safe, like Robin and Steve already do. He understands and finds it more than reasonable. Hell, if his parents learned that he swings both ways, who knows how they would react; if past fights with his dad were any indication, it would get nasty. Good thing that a) Steve couldn't give less of a shit about what his father thinks and b) they're never around anyway and have all but formally abandoned him in Hawkins, so screw them. But what about lying to each other for fear of what if, now that they know they might have a chance together? That's harder to accept. ]
Exactly. Like with a pressure cooker, and it might still explode in the end.
[ Steve waits after that, allows Eddie to gather his thoughts, and almost expects him to have changed his mind and to tell him to go and leave him alone and not come back because that would be infinitely easier. Steve will leave if that's what Eddie wants, even if it hurts, because he has to respect the other man's decisions. He doesn't realize he's been holding his breath until Eddie's little thumb brush and the following answer feel like they punch it out of him. ]
Yeah...? That's good to know.
[ Because it gives him all the permission he needs, doubts be damned. His other hand cups Eddie's face, the pad of Steve's thumb gently brushing his cheekbone before he closes his eyes and leans in to press his lips to Eddie's. He keeps the kiss light at first, a tentative press of lips as if he's afraid to spook Eddie or himself. Steve's heart is racing like a restless bird, caged within the bones of his ribs, and it's not that much different from how he felt during his very first kiss with a girl. He's just as nervous as he was then, because he's kissing a guy for the first time too, and this is Eddie, and the world isn't ending.
It just feels natural; it feels right. And it's in part because it feels so incredibly normal and good that Steve does what he does when he's kissing someone, which is wrapping an arm around their waist to bring them close and deepen the kiss, with enthusiasm and want leaking through his movements.]
[ Eddie wants to tell him that he doesn’t really mind the “freak” moniker. Maybe there was a time when it used to hurt, but he’ll never admit that he ever cared what someone else thought of him, and so he’s accepted it, made it his own. But Steve is saying such sweet things…highly complimentary things, really, and Eddie can’t bear to cut him off. It takes a lot to make him blush like a schoolgirl. He’s not sure anyone’s managed to do it before, actually, but somehow anything Steve says manages to get to his very core.
He hates the idea of having to keep this silent. Someone as loud and brash as Eddie has never felt any need for that in any situation, but he’s not an idiot. He knows that this is different than playing into the Satanism and human sacrifice rumors. In a shitty little town like Hawkins, this could get them killed. It shouldn’t, but it could. That’s what’s terrifying, alongside the fact that they might be found out regardless, and he would very much like to not be the person who ruins Steve Harrington’s life.
But he also knows that the two of them are right. This is something they both feel and apparently have been feeling for some time, and if it hasn’t gone away yet, it isn’t going to. They could probably ignore it for a little longer, deny and pretend like no attraction exists behind their little shared glances, but it’s all just going to build up and explode sooner or later.
So he grants permission. His way of saying that he does want to give this a try, for better or worse. He wants to try to navigate this, so long as Steve does. He tenses only briefly, ready to flee and proclaim this a mistake before it can go any further—but then, slowly, he relaxes. If Eddie had any doubts, they’re all dashed away in an instant. This is right, his brain urges him as he melts into Steve’s embrace. This is right, this is right, this is right. It all just feels correct, even to a man who hasn’t been kissed before at all—Steve’s hand warm on his waist and lips on his own. He could easily swoon if he weren’t already seated.
He’s not a brave man, but he feels a spark of it for a moment. With trembling hands, he reaches up and carefully slips his fingers into Steve’s hair, finally making good on his promise to mess it up. It’s completely exhilarating, and when they part, he looks dazed and flushed, blinking as if the lights have just been flicked on. ]
[ Steve does mind, just like he gets annoyed when people make fun of Dustin's lack of teeth or Robin's quirkiness. He knows what it's like to act like it doesn't affect you. People who say those things are total morons, but it still gets under your skin at times and erodes you from the inside out. He's had to deal with one too many criticisms from his own father, too, to know.
The kids—teens, really—might not be his direct family, but he gets fiercely protective all the same, and Eddie...he does not see Eddie as family because then kissing him would be weird, but even if these things between them didn't work out, Steve would still care and look after him all the same. They're all a pack now.
He doesn't want to be chased out of town by narrow-minded folks any more than he wants to get eaten by demobats, but his reputation is the last of his worries. Steve is not going to ruin another good thing, another shot at a happy relationship, because of what people might say. They just need to be smarter and not draw too much attention to themselves while still doing what they want. If they managed to keep the mess with the upside down a secret from most of the population these years, this probably can't be that hard, right?
Right. ... Gods, He has no idea what he's doing, and he is way over his head.
But he knows one thing, and it is the only one that matters. That he might be more than a little bit in love with Eddie, and that the man is just too precious when he blushes to not kiss him senseless.
Okay, that makes two things, actually. Whatever. His brain is busy, and all his attention is on Eddie's mouth, the lingering taste of the beer on their tongues, and how warm the other man is under his touch. He also feels the other man tense up and then relax, so he keeps the kiss deep and slow. Then Eddie reaches out to touch his hair, which is a very good sign that makes Steve hum a little into the kiss out of happiness, like the dork he is.
There's a smile on his lips and a soft look in his brown eyes as he looks at his partner after the kiss, waiting for a verdict. Eddie makes him laugh. ]
Hmmm. You sure? [ One of his hands reaches up to the tips of Billy's hair, and he wraps a curl around his index finger. ] I dunno, maybe you need another try to really vanish any doubts.
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no subject
Date: 2025-11-03 03:07 am (UTC)pizza and spaghetti have the same exact flavors steve
it’s a match made in heaven
[ Never mind the textures, but…Eddie clearly doesn’t mind. ]
most vegetarians I’m pretty sure???
leah yeah
let yourself in
maybe i’ll have that drink for you
no subject
Date: 2025-11-03 07:46 pm (UTC)Not true, there are like hundreds of different pizza flavors. And it's all about how weird it is to bite into something pizza-shaped and then end with a mouthful of stringy pasta.
[ Is this really such a big deal? No, but he finds it funny how offended and passionate Eddie can get over these sorts of things. He's no better. ]
...
Fine, you got a point, about vegetarians.
Smartass.
I'm getting in the car, so I won't be able to reply until I am waiting for the pizzas.
But yeah, I'm omw right now.
Oh? Mr. Mundson, are you actually propositioning me?
no subject
Date: 2025-11-03 09:14 pm (UTC)jesus christ it's called CONTRAST
[ There's definitely a myriad of more important things to worry about...but if Eddie is going to get fired up about something, it's probably better that it's weird pizza opinions than music. He'd never shut up if it was music.
He makes good use of Steve’s inability to reply, only sending his next message when he's sure he's hit the road. ]
what if i am??
sorry for the TL;DR
Date: 2025-11-03 09:39 pm (UTC)[ If they argue about these sorts of silly things when they're not worrying about their possible impending doom, Steve is welcoming the chance to just be absurd young men with pizza and music opinions.
And hey, Steve also has a bit of an eclectic music taste. Eddie doesn't want to know the bullshit some people have given him just for listening to Queen. Talk about others not having good taste.
Eddie is correct that he doesn't have time to check the new messages until he's stopped by the pizza parlor and is waiting for their order. And when Steve sees that last text, he almost drops the phone. No way Eddie is actually serious. He's just playing along, and Steve is being silly.
Or are they?
Ever since befriending Robin, he's learned a lot of new things about relationships and people, and hell, maybe a bit about himself that he has never fully admitted. It's all too much to think about on a Friday night; maybe he should text Robin and ask if he's overthinking, but that will make it clear that he is, and oh fucks, Eddie must have been waiting for a reply to his text for longer than 10 minutes now. Godamnnit. ]
Then you'd better put your money where your mouth is.
[ He's going to throw his phone on the shotgun seat, rest his hands on the steering wheel, and bury his face there until the pizzas are ready. And then he will drove to Forest Hills Trailer Park and try not to die of embarrassment in the process. ]
no worries! we love a good tl;dr in this house
Date: 2025-11-04 12:41 am (UTC)His own attraction to men has never really seemed to matter much when he’s never done the whole relationship song and dance to begin with. It’s just always been a thing that existed in the background, vaguely acknowledged but never really interacted with--because this is the wrong place, there’s never been the right person, and there’s always been no time to make it work.
But something has shifted, and now he’s not so sure that the right person hasn't been staring him right in his face for months. Maybe it’s the fact that he almost died, or the fact that everything fucking sucks and he’s never getting out of this godforsaken town and still wakes up to graffiti on his door at least once a week accusing him of devil worship, but he’s feeling bolder as of late. Any shits he ever gave have been thrown well and truly out the window when he sends that text.
And then he immediately wonders if he should backtrack.
He paces and eyes his watch, trying to estimate what the right amount of time to wait is before he proclaims it was just a joke and don’t get too worked up about it, man. How long does it really take to grab a pizza? He’s convinced he’s worn the carpet thin by the time he gets a response, and he scrambles to read it.
Oh.
Okay.
Well… ]
will do ;)
[ He’ll be waiting when Steve pulls up, leaned against the frame of the open door, light pouring out from behind him. If he’s nervous (and god, he is; his heart is pounding and his shaking hands are only masked by the fact that his arms are crossed over his chest), he hides it well, smiling a lazy smile as Steve steps onto the rickety porch. ]
Harrington.
[ He inclines his head and begins to move aside to let him in, but then his gaze falls on the boxes and he lets out a bark of laughter. ]
Did you actually bring me a pizza-ghetti? You’re a real gentleman, huh?
Ah, I'm glad then. ♥ Steve will calm down in a bit. Maybe.
Date: 2025-11-04 01:24 am (UTC)Steve's relationship with men had never exactly been stellar. His own father is an insufferable asshole who is also a cheater. His ex-best friend Tommy was shallow and mean, and for years Steve refused to acknowledge it because he was his closest friend. He doesn't want to talk badly about Billy Hargrove, both because he was Max's sibling and because it's rude to speak ill of the dead, but the guy almost killed him after he spent a whole semester giving Steve the weirdest mixed signals. So, not great either.
None has really felt safe before. Not the way Eddie does.
And Eddie is, well, all the things Dustin assumed Steve liked about Robin. He's funny, smarter than anyone gives him credit for, and more selfless than he himself gives credit for. He can also drive Steve up a wall and get him to act a bit childish, which isn't exactly as much of a downside as others might think. Eddie also couldn't care less about Steve's reputation or who he was supposed to be, not anymore, and that feels so freeing.
And the curly hair is nice. The 'I want to touch it and see how it feels' type of nice. It's hella distracting when Eddie sometimes munches on a strand or plays with it.
Those are the things Steve kept thinking about as he drove to Eddie's place after reading that last text, and it's honestly a miracle he didn't hit a lamp pole on the way there.
Okay, he can do this; he can play it cool. It's all about steps. Grab the pizzas, get in, meet Eddie, do NOT hold onto the pizza box that hard, the sides are getting squished, do not smile like you're having a nervous breakdown... ]
I think that after almost dying, we might have reached the stage where you can call me by my first name, you know.
[ Smiling is actually the easiest part, because he is happy to see Eddie, even if he's got no idea what he got himself into. ]
And yes, I've got you your pizza-ghetti abomination. [ Steve lets out a dramatic sigh; he's learning that shit from both Max and Dustin, but then he's back to smiling and offering the aforementioned abomination to Eddie. ] Well, I do try. Just because it's something I am not used to, it doesn't mean I can't learn to like it too. Some things are an acquired taste, right?
[ He is mostly talking about the pizza-ghetti. ]
let them both be nervous wrecks...it's what they deserve
Date: 2025-11-06 03:14 am (UTC)[ He tilts his head and grins, putting an emphasis on the use of his first name. He does an admirable job at making it all seem easy, smiling lazily like he’s not ready to shake right out of his skin with nerves, but he’s all too aware that if he doesn’t move this conversation on quickly, he’s going to start overthinking everything.
So he gives his racing thoughts no opportunity to get the jump on him. He pushes off of the doorframe and makes a vague gesture for Steve to follow him inside, wandering off into the depths of the kitchen before he can even confirm that he has followed. ]
And, uh, I do call you by your first name all the time, by the way. Maybe, just maybe, I like the variety.
[ His voice comes slightly muffled as he rummages through the fridge. ]
Which is something I don’t have when it comes to drinks, so, uh…will it be beer, beer or…big surprise…beer?
Yup. Finally having a normal experiences instead of being nervous about monsters.
Date: 2025-11-06 07:28 pm (UTC)Eddie's voice and mannerisms make the casualness convincing for sure, which leaves Steve wondering if he's the only one who's always a hair away from a nervous breakdown.
He used to be better at these things, the whole song and dance of flirting and figuring out if the other person was interested. It's something he only did with girls, and he's a bit out of his element here because Hawkins, Indiana, is the worst possible place to test out where your boundaries lie in terms of attraction, but...but. He really would like things to work out with Eddie. If there is anything to work out between the two, that's it.
The other man moving moving gets Steve out of his head and back on track, and he's quick to follow him and place the pizza boxes on the counter once they reach the kitchen. ]
There's nothing wrong with liking variety; it makes life more interesting, right? [ He leans his hip against the counter as he watches Eddie fish out whatever he can find. ] Tsh, well, those are very difficult choices. Maybe beer, I'm not picky.
[ Eddie will find him still smiling when he decides to turn around. Either that, or he will notice Steve looking around with interest before their eyes meet again. ]
This place looks so much better now that there's no portal to hell in your ceiling. I like it; it seems very lived-in.
[ It's an honest admission, even if Eddie's house might look a bit messy and there's a concerning amount of mugs around. It looks like a home. Unlike his house, which mostly looks like an home decor catalog because his parents have a very strict opinion on how things might look for appearance's sake, even if they're never at home. It makes the house very cold and lifeless. ]
no subject
Date: 2025-11-11 07:27 am (UTC)[ He echoes back to him, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. He is an acquired taste, and perhaps not one that many people dare to sample. He’s loud and opinionated and quick to anger, likes his music loud enough to shatter eardrums, talks too much when he’s nervous, doesn’t understand the concept of personal space…and yet his pitiful hope is that maybe, just maybe, Steve Harrington is one of those brave few.
He keeps going back and forth on it. That message—you'd better put your money where your mouth is—it sounded like a challenge, not a denial, but this shitty little backwoods town isn’t the place for a person to be attracted to anything but the opposite sex. And while Eddie couldn’t care less, who’s to say that Steve doesn’t feel differently?
He takes his tie in the fridge, vaguely hoping that he’ll find something in there to make all of this easier. He doesn’t. So he cracks another joke instead. ]
Sorry, I lied. Fresh out of beer. Only have beer.
[ Finally, he collects two bottles and turns to place them on the counter, his heart damn near leaping out of his throat when he’s met with that goddamn smile that might just be his favorite image in the world. Their eyes meet, and Eddie is quick to glance away, suddenly finding a lock of his own hair very interesting. He twists a dark curl around a finger, then slips it into his mouth to chew on. It’s an awful habit, one he’s had since he was a kid, and a clear sign of nerves.
He’s grateful for the distraction when Steve moves on to the state of the house. He pulls himself up to sit on the counter, observing the ceiling above them. ]
Almost seems normal now, right? Like it…like it never even happened.
[ A frown creases his features. Having his home back is fantastic, but he’ll never be able to shake the image of what happened here. It plagues nightmares and day terrors and the thought of just taking off to leave it all behind crosses his mind at least once a day. He’ll never do it, though. Not when it feels like there’s still so much tying him here. ]
Sometimes I think I dreamt it, but…that would be too easy, huh?
no subject
Date: 2025-11-12 11:55 pm (UTC)But it also seems that he works well with those kinds of people too, either by balancing out their extremes with his own personality or by enabling their shenanigans when the moment called for it. Maybe he's not a total lost cause when it comes to relationships, even though he still needs to have a successful one now that he's finally being himself instead of putting up a front to make others like him. ]
Shame, but I think I can handle your beer.
[ What he cannot handle so well is Eddie fidgeting and munching on a strand of curly brown hair, because then his eyes immediately go to it, which means Steve's staring at Eddie's mouth before he realizes he's doing it and hastily looks away. Yeah, that kind of thing can get you punched or worse around here, but perhaps Eddie did not notice.
And maybe Vecna would simply drop dead one day on his own and stop being a problem. Sure, why not?
He can dream. And what was that thing Robin told him one day, about some sort of code to know if people were into the same thing as you? Something about being friends with Dorothy? ]
So, uhm....do you like The Wizard of Oz?
[ Wait, that wasn't it!, and Steve regrets opening his mouth almost immediately. That sounded so stupid.
While mentally chastising himself, and as Eddie sits on the counter, he reaches out to grab both bottles of beer and uses one to open the other, placing the corner or lip of the second bottle's cap under the edge of the cap on the first. A neat little trick he learned ages ago. He hands the open beer to Eddie and hooks the first bottle cap on the edge of the opening of his one bottle, popping the second bottle cap open. He's listening to Eddie as he does it, and his brows furrow in understanding. ]
Yeah, I know how it is. For the longest time, I couldn't even go near my pool, especially at night. Not after learning that one of Nancy's friends was taken by a demogorgon while she was at my house. If only we could get rid of the terrifying memories and scars with some new paintjob. A do over.
[ Steve has one hand curled around the beer, but the other curls slightly over his midsection. They don't hurt anymore, but the wound caused by the demobats has left him with some awful scarring, something Eddie also knows well. He worries about the other kind of scars that are harder to spot and are there nonetheless, less about himself and more about the kid and his other friends, like Eddie. ]
You can talk to me if you need it. You know that, right? Since explain this to people who had no idea what happened is out of the question and all...at least we can have each other's backs.
no subject
Date: 2025-11-13 03:07 am (UTC)[ Eddie isn’t familiar with the terminology anyway, not really moving in the right circles to understand what it is that Steve is trying to ask, even if he had gotten the the phrase right. There’s a lot he could probably learn from Robin; he’s just never needed to know before. He blinks and raises his eyebrows, looking amused. ]
Just curious, or…?
[ He doesn’t chastise him for the odd question, just tilts his head and fails to fight back a fond smile. Steve fumbles more than Eddie would have ever expected someone with a reputation for being suave and charming to fumble, but he finds it almost painfully endearing. He almost feels a little smug, knowing that the side of Steve that he gets to see—the one that’s a little more human and a little less performance for the sake of other people—is one that so many others have missed out on. Their loss, really.
He snorts and gives a little roll of his eyes at that neat little bottle trick. ]
Alright, showoff. Calm down. Wouldn’t want me falling in love, would you?
[ As if he didn’t already fall for him ages ago. It might even be a way to test the waters, to figure out if they’re on the same page, or at least a similar one—if only Eddie didn’t say such things on the regular. He doesn’t allow his words linger between them anyway. He clears his throat, reaches for his beer, and abandons chewing on his hair in favor of sipping it quietly as he observes the perfectly normal ceiling. It feels too normal, like there should be some evidence of what happened, but it’s all been patched and painted and covered up. ]
Yeah, I know, man.
[ Wayne worries, but he’s known his nephew for long enough to know that he can’t strong-arm anything out of him. Eddie is too stubborn for that, and he doesn’t want to burden his uncle more than he already has, so he keeps quiet. Doesn’t tell him that he sometimes aches so bad, he struggles to get out of bed in the morning, or that he’ll forego sleep entirely if he hears so much as a rustle outside, or that he sometimes feels like he did die and that all of this is an unexplainable figment of his imagination.
But Steve—Steve was there too. He’s experienced all of this more than once and, from the sound of it, plenty of sleepless nights and nightmares too. It’s a shared experience and there’s nothing that needs explaining between the two of them, nothing he can say that should sound too outlandish. Eddie frowns, his hand drifting to his torso where a knot of nasty scar tissue lives now, just beneath the thin fabric of his t-shirt. ]
So, uh…you’d let me know if I was actually dead, right? If I didn’t actually get dragged out of there or something?
no subject
Date: 2025-11-13 10:20 pm (UTC)Boy, did they. Okay, Eddie's answer was absolutely not helpful at all, or perhaps Steve missed something when Robin explained this to him. Either way, he's clearly misstepped and feels like an idiot, but because that is not exactly a new feeling for him, he's going to soldier on.
No reason, really. After working at Family Video, I have stupid movies in my head all day.
[He shrugs and takes a sip of his drink in an attempt to look nonchalant, and if Eddie doesn't buy that excuse, perhaps the view of Steve's exposed throat might distract him.] Robin would also like to know there are others like her in Hawkins; perhaps one day she will open up to Eddie as well.
Steve is relieved that Eddie doesn't seem too put off by the odd question. That's another thing he liked about the other man; he knows how to put others at ease when needed, even if that smile is doing funny things to his stomach. He smiles back, because how can he not?
Someone actually liking Steve for who he is to the core, a normal guy who gets a bit awkward in front of someone he actually likes, would be a pleasant novelty. He can still be smooth if need be; that comes easy when he's comfortable with the other person, but his dorky side might also show up more. It's a 50/50 on which side Eddie might find more interesting.
It's just one of the many I know. You should have seen how fast I could shotgun a beer back in the day. It's the reason I no longer have a gag reflex. [ He allows himself a grin, even if he doesn't really miss his time as King Steve. Then, at Eddie's question, he seems to think about it for an actual three seconds, considering if he's reading too much into it, before adding; ] Would that really be so bad? I like to think I could be a pretty decent boyfriend.
[ It's said casually enough that Eddie might simply take it as a joke if he doesn't want to read too much into it, but there's an almost unnoticeable edge to Steve's voice, something in the way he's holding his shoulder now, that seems to show he's asking a legitimate question back. They're both careful, and for a good reason, but Steve starts to think he might not be the only one walking on eggshells around something they're too afraid to voice out loud.
And then the reality they live in, with a parallel dimension and monsters, becomes once again too hard to ignore. Steve doesn't look at the ceiling, instead he keeps his eyes on Eddie to try and get a read on his body language because personal new feelings aside, he does want the best for Eddie and worries about all the shit he had to go through. Not only the demobats and Vecna, but the much harsher reality of seeing an innocent girl murdered in front of you and having a whole town blame you for it,
He might not be familiar with that specific experience, but he is no stranger to post-traumatic stress, to looking for dangers in shadows, and to knowing you can't even tell your family why you jump when the lights flicker or a room feels too cold. ]
You're not dead, Eddie, promise. We made it out, you kept Dustin safe, something I'll never be able to thank you enough for. Just don't tell the little shit, okay? [ As if Dustin already doesn't know that Steve would do anything for him, or any of the other kids. ] And besides...! If you were dead and I am here with you, that would mean I might be dead too. And would a corpse has such fantastic hair as you and me? I don't think so.
no subject
Date: 2025-11-14 06:28 am (UTC)Honestly, he’d be content to just do this all evening—stare and daydream and admire Steve while the two of them simply exist in the same room. It sounds like a good enough night to him, because that’s about as far as this can ever go, right? Maybe he misunderstood that message, because nothing can actually happen between them and Eddie is content to just deal with that and pretend like he doesn’t feel more.
But the it’s the reason I no longer have a gag reflex—that’s what gets him. Eddie chokes on his beer, goes beet red, and covers his face with his hands with a soft murmur of “oh my god”. He sits there for a moment, peering over his fingers with an upturned gaze. One sinful thought alone wouldn’t be so bad, but Steve just has to follow it up with the implication that he could be a decent boyfriend, and Eddie can’t quite pull himself together as quickly as he would like.
Still flushed bright red, he clears his throat and tries to soothe his nerves with another swig off beer. If he had any worries about being dead before, they’re gone now. There’s no mistaking the uptick in his pulse, his heart pounding like a drum in his ears. ]
I, uh…I think I could fall in love with worse.
[ He bites his nails, pausing for just a moment, eyes wide. And then he decides to just go for it, take the leap. He doesn’t have much to lose at this point. ]
Would it be so bad if I did? Fall in love with you, I mean.
no subject
Date: 2025-11-14 10:54 pm (UTC)But all that stops being so important the moment Eddie blushes up a storm, because Steve can see it even with the man covering his face. He's torn between being a little concerned about the sudden reaction, wondering which one of his comments caused it, and then finding it absolutely endearing. ]
You okay there, Eds?
[ He has to ask because he is a good friend who worries; but if Eddie peeks at him from in between his fingers, he will see Steve with his head tilted towards him like a big puppy who's staring at something fascinating and with a little smile on his face. The smile looks more hopeful than smug or anything of the sort; there's in fact a hint of insecurity to it if one looks at Steve's eyes.
Perhaps that was too much? It was too much.
But then Eddie actually answers, still flushed in a way that makes Steve want to crawl in his personal space and kiss each one of his cheekbones. And that is such a wild thought to have about a male friend of all things, but it's not that much different from the ones he's had when he was actually dating and in love with Nancy, so it all feels natural, really. That is probably the scariest part, that he can tell already that he's in too deep.
He's not the only one, if what Eddie is saying means that he's got it just as bad. It gives Steve hope, and it makes him nervous as hell, but he also can't fight the smile that's spreading on his lips. ]
No, it won't be. Dangerous, perhaps, since we live in this shit town, but...I think it all would be worth it. That you're worth it.
[ It's honestly a miracle that he manages to get that out without stuttering or making a fool of himself, but Steve figured that if Eddie was brave enough to give him an honest answer, he deserves the same. Steve doesn't think he's ever felt this nervous or terrified of what might happen since that night in the tunnels with Dustin, when Steve and his nail bat were the only thing between the kid and a pack of demogods. Steve takes a deep breath, hands fidgeting with the beer bottle. ]
I really like you, Eddie. [ And it might sound a little childish and innocent, considering who they were, but it is the best way Steve knows how to express this right now. ] And it's a little scary, but it's the truth.
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Date: 2025-11-16 05:44 am (UTC)He’s thoroughly flustered, however, when Steve says those four little words: I really like you. ]
Yeah…?
[ His hand goes straight to his hair again, tugging on a curl anxiously. His gaze shifts to Steve, eyes enormous and dark as he searches his face for…anything. Any sign that he may be fucking with him or trying to tell a bad joke, any sign that Eddie needs to shut this down before it becomes really bad, but all he finds is honesty. ]
I, uh…
[ He licks his lips, swallows thickly, and shit, he’s terrified. His heart pounds in his eardrums and flutters like a bird against the confines of his ribcage, desperate to be free. Yearning quietly is one thing—the safe thing, but putting it out there in the world…it can’t be taken back after that. But Steve was brave enough to say it, and Eddie…Eddie is supposed to be putting his money where his mouth is, so… ]
I like you too, man. Like—a hell of a lot more than I’ve ever liked anyone, honestly?
[ He takes a deep breath and shakes his head. ]
But it doesn’t—it doesn’t have to be anything, you know? You don’t have to—we don’t have to—I can pretend you didn’t say anything. If you want.
[ He peers up at him with a weak smile, anxiety etched into his features. He wants so badly to reach out and take this for what it is, to pull Steve in by his collar and kiss him absolutely stupid before he can change his mind and laugh it all off, but he just can’t. Because Steve is right—it is extremely dangerous in this shitty little midwest town where Eddie gets harassed just for his long hair and metal music. And that’s Eddie, who couldn’t give less of a shit what people think of him. Steve Harrington, however…popular, handsome, affluent family, known chick magnet.
Eddie can’t do that to him. Softly, he repeats: ]
I can pretend, Steve. It’s okay.
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Date: 2025-11-16 09:19 pm (UTC)All those are things Steve would never have imagined before; he would be thinking about another man, but life throws you curveballs like those. Like when Eddie admits he likes him back, because what are the odds of that? Steve feels himself torn between wanting to beam at Eddie, fidget some more, and hyperventilate, but he managed to keep that last reaction in check. He runs his fingers through his hair to get it out of his face and maybe takes a second to coyly hide behind his hand for a moment. ]
Oh, that's great. I mean, more than great. I wasn't expecting reciprocation, so this is g... [ Don't say great again! ] ...fantastic.
[ It feels a little awkward to talk to him about this when he's still seated, so he stands up so they're at the same eye level and moves closer to Eddie. Steve's just like that, it seems, moving towards uncertainty or possible doom when he should be running for the hills and saving himself a lot of trouble. But Eddie's wroth, as he said, and he's a man of his word. He takes a deep breath, his Adam's apple bobbing slightly as he gulps before speaking. ]
No, that's not okay. You don't have to. We don't…we shouldn't have to do that.
[ He understands why Eddie is offering, and right here is probably the correct moment to decide what to do next, because they do not live in kinder times or around open-minded people. But he also knows what pretending is like; he's done it plenty in the past, even if the situation is different. He doesn't want Eddie to have to do that, like he didn't want Robin to hide from him either. It hurts too much not to be faithful to yourself. He reaches out to gently brush his hand against Eddie, slow enough that the other man can pull away if he wants, making Steve's own wariness evident. He gives a small smile of his own in response to that hesitant one, though, aiming for encouraging. ]
Besides, it wouldn't really change anything, would it? Not for me, at least.
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Date: 2025-11-17 06:56 am (UTC)I know I’m a freak, Steve, but I’m not insane enough to not reciprocate.
[ Steve is an easy man to fall for, no matter how little experience Eddie has with the concept. Handsome and brave and caring and frankly hilarious whether he means to be or not is apparently a dangerous combo for Eddie. But this is neither the ideal place nor the ideal time, and Steve is right, they shouldn’t have to do pretend, but they will, and why should Steve have to navigate the complexities of a relationship like this when he can just find a pretty girl? Any pretty girl he wants. Eddie just wants so badly to spare him everything about this, but…
Eddie closes his eyes, takes a deep breath as Steve moves from the space beside him. He waits for a beat, assuming the sound of the ancient screen door is going to follow, thus leaving him with two uneaten pizzas and a broken heart. But that isn’t what happens. Steve merely comes to stand before him. He brushes his hand against Eddie’s, and Eddie doesn’t pull back. In fact, he carefully brushes his thumb against Steve’s as his eyelids flutter open once more and finally shifts his gaze to Steve’s and—he’s lost. That smile is everything, and he’d happily gaze at it for the rest of his life given the opportunity. ]
It wouldn't change. You'd just be putting a lid on it.
[ That’s one thing. You can hide it all you like but it doesn’t exactly go away. Eddie hesitates. ]
Hey, uh, Steve?
[ His voice comes soft as he scoots forward to the edge of the counter. ]
You know, if you wanted to kiss me, I wouldn’t exactly be opposed.
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Date: 2025-11-17 11:26 pm (UTC)His eyes keep going to Eddie's hands and his long fingers, which frankly look very nice and he wouldn't mind feeling them on him, to the point he's starting to get jealous of the guy's hair. Steve can't help but marvel at the realization of how cute it is that Eddie is being kind of shy over all this. Better that than anger or disgust. Steve hadn't known what to expect; he didn't exactly have plans to ever tell Eddie about his growing interest, but he's glad that he did now, even if everything is still so new and fragile. ]
You're not a freak. You're just...different. That isn't bad, despite what people might tell you. You're fun, you have a great imagination, and you're kind. If that's being a freak, maybe we all should be more freaky on the regular.
[ He seems affronted that Eddie would call himself that, even if it's true that he's heard people call him those kinds of things—and worse—before. It makes Steve feel guilty, too, because his past is filled with bad decisions and condescending name-calling towards people who didn't deserve it, like Eddie, and now he knows better.
His protectiveness came up so fast that his brain didn't register that Eddie said 'reciprocate' until a good long second after the fact. Oh. If Eddie does glance at him, he might see Steve realize that in real time, a little but pleased smile appears on his face, not smug but satisfied that Eddie might like him back.
In this town, yes, they would need to keep up appearances in front of others and pretend so they can keep each other safe, like Robin and Steve already do. He understands and finds it more than reasonable. Hell, if his parents learned that he swings both ways, who knows how they would react; if past fights with his dad were any indication, it would get nasty. Good thing that a) Steve couldn't give less of a shit about what his father thinks and b) they're never around anyway and have all but formally abandoned him in Hawkins, so screw them. But what about lying to each other for fear of what if, now that they know they might have a chance together? That's harder to accept. ]
Exactly. Like with a pressure cooker, and it might still explode in the end.
[ Steve waits after that, allows Eddie to gather his thoughts, and almost expects him to have changed his mind and to tell him to go and leave him alone and not come back because that would be infinitely easier. Steve will leave if that's what Eddie wants, even if it hurts, because he has to respect the other man's decisions. He doesn't realize he's been holding his breath until Eddie's little thumb brush and the following answer feel like they punch it out of him. ]
Yeah...? That's good to know.
[ Because it gives him all the permission he needs, doubts be damned. His other hand cups Eddie's face, the pad of Steve's thumb gently brushing his cheekbone before he closes his eyes and leans in to press his lips to Eddie's. He keeps the kiss light at first, a tentative press of lips as if he's afraid to spook Eddie or himself. Steve's heart is racing like a restless bird, caged within the bones of his ribs, and it's not that much different from how he felt during his very first kiss with a girl. He's just as nervous as he was then, because he's kissing a guy for the first time too, and this is Eddie, and the world isn't ending.
It just feels natural; it feels right. And it's in part because it feels so incredibly normal and good that Steve does what he does when he's kissing someone, which is wrapping an arm around their waist to bring them close and deepen the kiss, with enthusiasm and want leaking through his movements.]
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Date: 2025-11-22 12:53 am (UTC)He hates the idea of having to keep this silent. Someone as loud and brash as Eddie has never felt any need for that in any situation, but he’s not an idiot. He knows that this is different than playing into the Satanism and human sacrifice rumors. In a shitty little town like Hawkins, this could get them killed. It shouldn’t, but it could. That’s what’s terrifying, alongside the fact that they might be found out regardless, and he would very much like to not be the person who ruins Steve Harrington’s life.
But he also knows that the two of them are right. This is something they both feel and apparently have been feeling for some time, and if it hasn’t gone away yet, it isn’t going to. They could probably ignore it for a little longer, deny and pretend like no attraction exists behind their little shared glances, but it’s all just going to build up and explode sooner or later.
So he grants permission. His way of saying that he does want to give this a try, for better or worse. He wants to try to navigate this, so long as Steve does. He tenses only briefly, ready to flee and proclaim this a mistake before it can go any further—but then, slowly, he relaxes. If Eddie had any doubts, they’re all dashed away in an instant. This is right, his brain urges him as he melts into Steve’s embrace. This is right, this is right, this is right. It all just feels correct, even to a man who hasn’t been kissed before at all—Steve’s hand warm on his waist and lips on his own. He could easily swoon if he weren’t already seated.
He’s not a brave man, but he feels a spark of it for a moment. With trembling hands, he reaches up and carefully slips his fingers into Steve’s hair, finally making good on his promise to mess it up. It’s completely exhilarating, and when they part, he looks dazed and flushed, blinking as if the lights have just been flicked on. ]
So, uh…I could get used to that, actually.
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Date: 2025-11-24 05:55 pm (UTC)The kids—teens, really—might not be his direct family, but he gets fiercely protective all the same, and Eddie...he does not see Eddie as family because then kissing him would be weird, but even if these things between them didn't work out, Steve would still care and look after him all the same. They're all a pack now.
He doesn't want to be chased out of town by narrow-minded folks any more than he wants to get eaten by demobats, but his reputation is the last of his worries. Steve is not going to ruin another good thing, another shot at a happy relationship, because of what people might say. They just need to be smarter and not draw too much attention to themselves while still doing what they want. If they managed to keep the mess with the upside down a secret from most of the population these years, this probably can't be that hard, right?
Right.
...
Gods, He has no idea what he's doing, and he is way over his head.
But he knows one thing, and it is the only one that matters. That he might be more than a little bit in love with Eddie, and that the man is just too precious when he blushes to not kiss him senseless.
Okay, that makes two things, actually. Whatever. His brain is busy, and all his attention is on Eddie's mouth, the lingering taste of the beer on their tongues, and how warm the other man is under his touch. He also feels the other man tense up and then relax, so he keeps the kiss deep and slow. Then Eddie reaches out to touch his hair, which is a very good sign that makes Steve hum a little into the kiss out of happiness, like the dork he is.
There's a smile on his lips and a soft look in his brown eyes as he looks at his partner after the kiss, waiting for a verdict. Eddie makes him laugh. ]
Hmmm. You sure? [ One of his hands reaches up to the tips of Billy's hair, and he wraps a curl around his index finger. ] I dunno, maybe you need another try to really vanish any doubts.